Here is a list of computer quotes and "bumper stickers". How many of them apply to you and your computer?
Real programmers have keyboard dents on their foreheads.
Programming is a race between programmers trying to create bigger and better idiot-proof programs and the universe trying to create bigger and better idiots.
If it were easy to understand, we wouldn't call it code.
C:\Reality.sys not found, reboot universe? Y/N?
C:\Coffee.com not found, reboot user? Y/N?
C code. C code run. Run code, run. Run, dammit, run!
User Error: Replace user and strike any key to continue.
If it has syntax, it's not user friendly.
To continue, strike keyboard with forehead.
Program: A magical spell cast over a computer allowing it to turn one's input into error messages.
If cars had followed the same developmental path as computers, a Rolls Royce would cost $100, get a million miles a gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside.
Hardware: the part of the computer that can be kicked. If you can only curse at it, it's software.
Computers eat time -- we only THINK they run on electricity.
Calm down, it's only ones and zeroes.
One picture had better be worth a thousand words -- it takes up much more disk space.
Life would be so much easier if we could read the source code.
LIFE.DOC not included -- booting WINGIT.SYS
Life needs pulldown menus and an undo function.
I have not lost my mind, it's backed up on disk somewhere.
Computers run on smoke. If it leaks out, they don't work.
A computer is a genie that can grant any wish. The catch is that you must express your wish exactly, in binary.
I wish there were a knob on my computer that turns up the intelligence. There's one called "brightness", but it doesn't work.
Artificial Intelligence stands no chance against Natural Stupidity.
Press any key to continue or any other key to quit.
Press Ctrl-Alt-Del now for IQ test.
Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue.
New Windows message: Smash forehead on keyboard to continue.
New Windows error message: "File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)"
New Windows error message: "Runtime Error 6D at 417A:32CF: Incompetent User."
New Windows error message: "WinErr 547: LPT1 not found... Use backup... PENCIL & PAPER."
New Windows error message: "User Error: Replace user."
New Windows message: "Backup not found: (A)bort (R)etry (P)anic"
Windows hasn't increased computer literacy. It's just lowered the standard.
Anderson's Law: Any system or program, however complicated, if looked at in exactly the right way, will become even more complicated.
Windows leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to LINUX.
What goes up, must come down. Ask any system administrator.
Windows multitasking: it can boot and crash at the same time.
System Error, hit any user to continue
Failure is not an option. It comes bundled with the software.
WE ARE MICROSOFT. RESISTANCE IS FUTILE. YOU WILL BE ASSIMILATED.
I'm out of bed and at the keyboard, what more do you want?
Had a life. Got a modem.
Be sure brain is engaged before send key is released.
I press the CONTROL key, but it's not giving me any.
Technology is not God, but it will do until a real one comes along.
I think your hard drive has a slipped disk.
Back up my hard drive? How do I put it in reverse?
Who is General Failure and why is he reading my hard drive?
Warning: keyboard not found. Press Enter to continue.
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