Madness takes it's toll, please have exact change.
Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
We're here to help you appreciate normal people.
I do not suffer from insanity -- I revel in it.
All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative.
Allow me to introduce my selves.
I'm not weird, I'm just normal by my own standards.
I'm going off to find myself. If you see me before I get back, please let me know where I'll be.
I'm not as think as you confused I am.
Oh, great time for the meds to wear off!
Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
It's as BAD as you think, and they ARE out to get you.
I just let my mind wander, and it didn't come back.
Hello? Can you help me?
Insanity-- a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world.
Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense.
I can't go to work today. The voices told me to stay home and clean the guns.
WARNING: mental backup in progress.
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Having abandoned my search for truth, I am now looking for a good fantasy.
Reality is for people who lack imagination.
You're not as real as you think you are.
Your reality is lies and balderdash, and I'm proud to say that I have no grasp of it whatsoever.
Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality.
Sometimes you just need to look reality in the eye, and deny it.
I've given up trying to escape from reality; they always find me anyway.
Okay, who stopped the payment on my reality check?
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If I throw a stick, will you leave?
You! Off my planet!
The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
Some people are alive only because it is illegal to kill them.
Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.
Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
So many stupid people, so few comets.
I'm not as dumb as you look.
You're denying some poor village of it's idiot!
Do they ever shut up on your planet?
Nothing is fool-proof to a sufficiently talented fool.
There are no stupid questions. Just stupid people.
I like you but I wouldn't want to see you working with sub-atomic particles.
Your kid may be an honor student, but you're still an idiot.
Nothing is fool-proof to a sufficiently talented fool.
i souport publik edekasion
If ignorance is bliss, then tourists are in a constant state of euphoria.
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Religion: The longest-running gag ever played on Mankind.
Organized Religion: The only thing preventing people from being civilized.
Welcome to the Afterlife. Smoking or Non?
People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
668 -- the neighbor of the beast.
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Grow your own dope... Plant a man.
My karma ran over your dogma.
We're going to keep on repeating history until we get a passing grade.
Support your local medical examiner -- die strangely.
The worst book in a trilogy is the fourth.
Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
Chaos, panic, & disorder - my work here is done.
Don't claim that you know everything - besides not being true, it's very irritating to those of us who do.
I'm practicing random acts of conciousness.
Don't take life so seriously; it isn't permanent.
If this had been a real emergency, we would have all fled in terror, and you would not have been notified.
Life is a sexually transmitted disease and is 100 percent fatal.
According to my calculations, the problem doesn't exist.
I didn't do it. You can't prove it. Nobody saw me. The sheep are lying.
I'm leaving my body to science fiction.
I'm the kind of person my parents warned me about.
It's been one of those days all week.
Please do not feed the ego.
Never believe generalizations.
Forgive and forget, but keep a list of the names.
No one here gets out alive. -Jim Morrison
Death is natures way of telling you to slow down.
Youth is fleeting, but immaturity can last a lifetime.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
Gravity is a myth. The Earth sucks.
Life's a beach, and then you drown.
Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.
Nobody's perfect. I'm Nobody.
I brake for...wait...AAAH!...NO BRAKES!!!!!
All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand.
Why be difficult, when with a bit of effort, you can be impossible?
Smile. It makes people wonder what you're thinking.
The road of good intentions is paved with Hell.
"Auntie Em: Hate you, hate Kansas, taking the dog. - Dorothy"
Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse.
Honk if you love peace and quiet.
Pardon my driving, I'm reloading.
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
Don't steal. The government hates competition.
I can only please one person a day, and today ain't your day... (tomorrow ain't looking good either).
I Brake For No Apparent Reason.
Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off NOW!
I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not too sure.
If everything is coming your way, then you're in the wrong lane.
Time flies when you don't know what you're doing.
It's bad luck to be superstitious.
CAUTION! I drive like you do!
Quantum Mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of.
I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
I'm not driving fast-just flying low.
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